Tag: howwemet

How we met (part 2)

After a lot of thought, I realised I should probably cut all cords with this guy as I was falling for him. I felt awful and didn’t really want to do this, but it was for the best. I didn’t say anything more to him; I’d smile at him in corridors, nothing more than that. He never asked why we stopped talking; I think he thought it was because of my boyfriend though. It felt like a piece of me was missing. I felt lost. I was empty inside.

Happy never-ending

Attending a party with my boyfriend, lo and behold, who should show up? Of course he had to be there with all my other closest mates.

As the night went on, most people were dancing, drinking, and having the time of their lives. I, however, was trying to find my difficult to deal with boyfriend. I gave up on him and did my own thing. People were dropping off to sleep as fast as the speed of light towards the end of the night. I was still wide awake; I set off to find him. I went into the kitchen and he was there. Girls chatting him up and flirting, he looked over to me and smiled.

I sat down at the dining table to join them. After a few drinks, he and I had a proper chat again, like we did before. My mood instantly changed after we started talking. It’s like nothing had changed between us.

Summer goodbyes

Summer was looking bright and cheerful, until one day. (This day was the worst of them all.) I was going on holiday with my boyfriend and his family.  We were about to leave, but then he pulled me aside and said he had something to tell me. He told me to sit down. My heart was beating so fast you probably could’ve seen it come out of my chest. I had a gut feeling I knew what he was going to say. “I cheated.” Just the words I thought were going to come out of his mouth. I wasn’t shocked; this was the second time he had done it. Tears came flooding, I had been shut down. Was I not good enough?

Cheating is a choice, not a mistake. I broke up with him there and then. He said nothing, not even an apology. The only thing he said to me was, “I thought about you the whole time.” I thought I was going to throw up. I phoned my mum to pick me up; she didn’t ask why, she knew already. I had no one.

Bring it back 

Summer was soon coming to an end.

Feeling down, I was just scrolling through my phone as bored as someone waiting for an Ipswich bus to turn up, wondering whether it actually will or whether they’re just wasting their time. Surfing through all the types of social media: Facebook, Snapchat, Twitter, Instagram etc. I receive a random snapchat from him. Him, with the gorgeous red beard and sweet-smelling scent. It was only a snapchat sent out to everybody about his car. Disappointing. I replied anyway and asked how he was.

A week later we met up on the 11thSeptember, seven months later than our first outing/date; we went on our first ‘official date’. It was as if nothing had even changed since we last started talking. We were the best of friends again. I had him back. Did he ever really leave?

Breakups hurt, but losing someone who doesn’t respect and appreciate you is a gain, not a loss. Never lose yourself while trying to hold on to someone who doesn’t care about losing you. One sided expectations can mentally destroy you. Don’t change so others will like you, be yourself and the right people will love the real you.

Two years later, and him and I are still together, and we couldn’t be happier. I’ve never been happier. Those feelings that came back never went away.

True love has a habit of coming back.IMG_8208

How we met (part 1)

shoes

About this time 3 years ago I was in Colchester Sixth Form, not really liking many of my subjects, which caused me to: bunk off any lessons I didn’t like; not concentrate in the lessons I actually went to and sleep often in school.

I tried dropping German as I took three other subjects anyway. But no, the college wouldn’t allow me to. So instead, I would bunk some of my lessons to do something more productive with my time. And believe me; I can now definitely say one of the days I did bunk, was certainly productive indeed. I just didn’t know it at the time.

No idea

Break was close to finishing and I was about to set off for German. Everyone had left the Student Pavilion, which was a social room where you can do work or talk, except one person. I had seen this guy around before but had never got the chance to talk to him. We started speaking – we had most of the same friends – and got to know each other a bit better. He was tall, auburn-haired, had electric blue eyes and a gorgeous ginger bushy beard. There was also something about the way he spoke, his voice, I could’ve listened to him talk all day. One thing that I noticed most of all was the rich, enticing essence of him. I can still remember it now. We spoke all week, at the same time when I was supposed to be going to boring German.

I had one problem: I was already in a relationship. The guy I was with was a bit of a dick to put it bluntly. I wasn’t so sure that he was the right one for me; he was too bossy and controlling, but I stayed with him anyway. I liked the idea of being in a relationship more than I liked him. Stupid, right?

Just an Outing

The week after meeting the guy I had grown to adore, he and I spent every free lesson and lunchtime we could together. We would go to the park and sit on the swing together in the pouring rain not having a care in the world talking about our future. ‘How many kids do you want? What do you want to do? Where do you want to go?’ Etc. We would play together like kids on a Sunday morning.

I would never normally even think about getting close to another guy whilst I’m in a relationship. I consider myself to be loyal and trustworthy. There was something that wasn’t right about the relationship I was in. I just couldn’t figure out what; I didn’t trust him. I had a gut feeling that he just wasn’t the right one for me. I knew I would never stay with him for the long run. Don’t marry someone you don’t want your children to be.

Marry someone that brings out the best in you, not the stress in you. When you know they’re the right person, you just know. There’s no easy way explaining it. I would never again get close to someone else whilst in a relationship. I’m happy now, there is no need to.

He asked me if I wanted to go out to the cinema and for a meal with him; he never classified it as a date so that was fine, right?

After a busy day at college, we met up and went to the park whilst we waited for the film. It was Thursday 11thFebruary the day after Deadpool – which we went to see – came out. We were in a world of our own: listening to music; gazing at each other; laughing at everything for no apparent reason, simply just because we could.

Six o’clock came around faster than we expected. The skies were soon nothing at all. It was like a child began to draw on it with a pencil and then erased it in a way that smudged and spread the grey. Meanwhile, the rain streaked down – invisible until it hit the sodden ground. Drenched, we sat at the back of the cinema as barely anyone was even in our screen room, which was odd considering the movie had just come out. It sure didn’t bother us though. We were so hyped up we crawled around behind all the seats trying not to get caught. We giggled like toddlers as if we had been caught doing something naughty. We talked and talked as if we hadn’t spoken for over 100 years. I don’t think we watched even half of the film as we were just too distracted by each other’s company. I never felt so alive when I was with him.